Holidays Bowl Me Over

I admit it. The holidays bowled me right over. I've been busy. And sick. I haven't lifted my needles in a week because I didn't want to contaminate my knitting with whatever germs afflict me. But I HAVE made some jewelry. I will say that for Christmas I got 6 balls of Licorice yarn in pink/grey, which is enough to make a Ruth for myself. It's enough to do some other things too, and I'll have to decide at a later time what it is I'm going to do with it. I also got a gift certificate to Hobby Lobby and a warning that I'd better spend it on myself. I try to explain to my boss that it is the DOING more than the DONE that I want, and therefore craft supplies which get made into things for other people really is a gift for myself, but she doesn't seem to understand.

Well, she didn't. Then I told her the story of Ruth. I bought the first 4 balls of that sweater with a gift certificate from another coworker, a birthday gift. I bought them for myself, because I got a similar warning from her. I started my project, I bought more yarn, I finished it and I wore it twice. I loved it. I really felt I had indulged and created something beautiful for myself. The second time I wore it was to a dinner with my Aunt Marge. She admired my sweater, and my mother said she'd suggested I make one for my Oma, who has MS and needs comfortable things to wear in the wheelchair, to keep her warm. My aunt told me that my sweater was beautiful and my Oma would love one in just those colors. Suddenly I felt like I had never made that sweater for me. I took it off in the restaurant, folded it up and handed it to my Aunt, and told her that when she saw my Oma three days later, she should give that sweater to her.

I own ONE thing that I knit. And it's made of sterling silver wire, and I swear the only reason I still have it is because I haven't found just the right person to give it to. It really is in the doing for me. Am I alone on this? It isn't that I don't want to make something for myself. It's just that the gift, for me, is the making, it is not what is made, and everything I knit is for me, even if the finished object gets handed off to someone else. My boss says I am generous. I say that isn't so. I'm just greedy about yarn and knitting, not about knitted things.